• Deepasha Jha

How to deal with Criticism

Updated: Jun 7, 2020

“You’re not going to be able to do this”, ” You’re wrong at every step!”, “You’re not worth it”, “You look ugly in that outfit”, “this is not for you” etc etc etc. High-five to you if you’ve come across any of these at any point of your lives. We all have, didn’t we? In the social world, it's human nature to judge and comment on anyone we find with a merit or a flaw. We take it upon us as a duty or an obligation to pinpoint and correct others, without realizing how it interprets to them.

There are two kinds of criticisms, a positive and a negative kind. Positive criticism leaves the impact of learning on one whereas, negative criticism leaves discouragement and often self-doubt.

The point is, that it is hard to educate every individual about the dynamics of criticism, but what we can do is, teach ourselves about how to handle the negative criticism.

Through the years I’ve learned that there 3 things, which if kept in mind can help us fight the bad criticism and save ourselves from being discouraged and disheartened.

1. Words can not hurt you until you let them.

You need to understand that the power of letting others affect you, resides in your hand. You get to choose whose words affect you and in what way. We often fail to realize this, but we need to look deeper and take control of that power. I get to decide whose word affects me, in what way they affect me, and to what extent.

2. Other people’s opinions don’t define you.

Be firm and confident about who you know you are. Opinions are mere judgments of people which are not based on facts but on the perspectives and mindset they have. So, what other people think about you, has nothing to do with what you really are. This is why you can’t let anyone define you.

3. You can not make everyone happy.

Seeking validation from others and trying to impress them, is neither your job nor the right thing to do. You’re not a pizza, you can’t make everyone happy.

What people throw at you is a reflection of who they are from inside. Many just try to comment and label you, because they can’t be you. The only reason they try to pull you down is that you’re above them. Criticism is often ignored when its effects can be very damaging. Believing in yourself through thick and thin, and having the courage of not letting anyone bring you down is what is going to help through this. Trust yourself, you’re doing amazing, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.


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